Here I will talk about what being too lovely is doing to you and what you have to switch and why.
Being just nice
Let’s start with what is a ‘healthier’ alternative to being too nice.
Well, it is an individual who is genuinely nice, but who also looks after their own needs.
Being too nice
Some people are too nice.
Too nice means in most cases someone who gives to others at their own expense.
This giving can include money, time, energy, etc.
People like these are giving, giving, and giving to others and are suppressing their own needs.
It is a coping mechanism.
What will being too nice do to you?
According to Dr. Gabor Mate unless an individual who is suppressing his or her needs will not start listening to their inner voice/gut instinct they or will get sick and die.
Everyone will be at their funeral: Oh..he/she was so a nice person.
If you don’t want that better start listening to your intuition. Stop being f*cking too nice a person. There is no point in dying early and being too nice.
Be you, be genuine and stop giving what you don’t have to people who don’t even deserve or value it.
If you are tired, have plans, or don’t want to do something they don’t, especially if it is always a one-way street and does not actually do you any favors.
Or when you don’t have extra money, energy, time, or willpower to give or donate to others at that moment then say no.
You don’t have to explain yourself, you can say ‘I can’t do it now’.
How do too-nice people become too nice?
People become too nice when in their childhood their parents are stressed, depressed, or traumatized and are not able to cope with the child’s feelings and authenticity.
The child starts to suppress his/her own needs so it will not bother the parents.
This way he/she ends up not being in touch with his/her own needs.
Children grow up and will do things for others even at their own expense. If this is something you are struggling with you will drag it into your business too.
How being too nice may affect your business?
You will hire people, not fire people, you will let small things slide, and then they become big problems.
You will take difficult customers, forgive employees, and don’t ask for enough money to cover your expenses. And much more.
These were just some examples, if you have a business big or small you may know those similarities with what I just said accrued and if you are too nice, you or your business will suffer.
Unf*ck yourself and your business will also work much more smoothly when you learn what you want, what you don’t want, what you can tolerate, and what you will not tolerate anymore.
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You will need to let go of employees, customers, and other relationships, deals, and contracts that no longer serve you or your business.
You will need to learn to communicate what you want, what you are looking for, and what you expect of others.
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